Spare me your hero fapping

“I don’t know what he had going on personally with the company or whatever it was. I know he wasn’t a temp like us,” Montero said. “I don’t know how much he was getting paid, but I was making good money there. You know I’m a little bummed out. I lost my job.”

via CBS

Patriarchy-brainwashed men will do anything, up to and often including decades of jail time, to avoid the long, slow, hard work of solidarity. Of standing arm-in-arm and building a movement with their most marginalized peers. Especially if putting in the work means making soup and watching kids instead of doing something flashy and satisfying in the spotlight. Especially if it involves taking direction. Especially if putting in the work means they have to do something hard every single day instead of just one time.

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7 billion earthquakes

Yup, and that is literally the entire game of growing up. Understanding that everyone around you also has those feelings. They really are that big for other people too. And when grown men don’t get over the need to force others to feel their feelings as loudly as they do, you get presidents threatening to nuke entire civilizations.

Kites don’t fly without something pulling them down

I know so many people struggling with identity and direction. And my real, honest advice for almost all of them these days is:

Take on more obligation. (But not as much as I did).

It’s amazing how many questions of “who am I?” and “what should I do?” fall away like loose ash when you bind yourself with the cords of interdependence.

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